Don't Run Alone: Finding Community as a Children's Pastor

It's time to run together. So many leaders around the world are saying the same thing - God is moving our church into greater unity. It's being emphasized everywhere you turn, but it's not a new concept at all. In fact, Paul wrote:

"He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with him. Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." 1 Thess 5:10-11 (NIV)

Paul writes that we are to "live together with Him." The "together" part is key. Thankfully, we have a tip as well from the first church - one of the ways to run together well is to encourage and build each other up! We are not made to run alone. We need encouragement. We need to be built up and we need help. This has almost never been as true for me as when I've led children.

Children's Pastoring can feel very lonely and discouraging. In most churches, you're sort of "down the hall" from all the "big people" and "stuff happening in the sanctuary." Even in our very family-oriented church where I was the children's pastor, I often remember feeling out of the loop in our pastoral staff meetings when talk revolved around a service that I hadn't attended. In fact, for many years, even my office was "down the hall" from the rest of the offices, sort of further emphasizing the loneliness (though, as an introvert, I enjoyed the quiet at times!). I needed encouragement but I also needed friendship. Through those years, I learned to ask for help, set up coffee dates for children's ministry, and find people who cared. I built leadership teams so that I wasn't leading alone, but also sought after mentors and those who had gone ahead.

Some of the amazing mentors I've had over the years.

My children's pastors community was in person and around the world, but we were "together."

Sometimes, I needed practical ideas (i.e. what printer won't break down on a Sunday morning!). Sometimes, I just needed encouragement or prayer. When we had children manifest in worship, I knew exactly who to call for help. I met with my senior leader, Sylvia Neusch, and she had tons of wisdom for helping these children be removed from torment and walk in the light. But having dear friends and like-minded peers can also help with the enemy's tactic of loneliness. I tried to always have a list of people I could text at any moment when it was a bad week who wouldn't judge or question, just pray. I keep people around me who have gone ahead and are running with us because we need that!

This happened again when I became a parent eight years ago. I saw the same pattern with raising my own children. Years ago, families would live close to one another and help day-to-day, but today, we are isolated units. While this isn't ideal, it is a cultural reality, and we have to ask ourselves how we can return to the virtue of "together in Him" in our modern age. We were born in this age for a reason, and God has a strategy to meet our community needs and help us fulfill our calling.

People to run with with a like-mind about children's ministry.

God meant for families to learn how to follow Him together.

My husband and I have provided that for others, too. We pour into our own children and the families in our ministry, but also other ministers. We know those little things that can help a ministry go well and we know the things that can hinder ministry! For years, I enjoyed helping the new children's minister who would call me and for ten minutes word dump and be able to respond, "I totally get it. I've been there! You've got this."

Grant and I with my mentee who became the children's pastor of our church!

I enjoy pouring into the fellow children's ministers so much that one girl I mentored eventually took over my role as children's pastor at my church! When it was time for me to move into new things, it was an honor to hand her the baton! Now, I get to see her run with the role in ways I could have never imagined.

This is a kingdom discipleship model: Be poured into, run alongside like-minded peers, and have those you pour into. This is a normal kingdom family.

And you can have this, too! God didn’t make you to run alone.

Because of this, we are offering free 30-minute virtual sessions for you to be encouraged, helped, and, most importantly, prayed for! Our heart is that every children's leader (and parent) feels part of God's great community and family. You are not alone, and we can help. Go online or click here to book a free help session today!